i have been heterosexual my entire life. and i have never been with a woman. i have actually only had sex with two men and been with one man for almost 40 years. as we got older, i became frustrated because hubby just was not giving me all of the loving i needed. one day, i know women are not suppose to look for porn on the internet, but i discovered the brother site, newbienudes and became interested and slowly found the lure of cyber sex both interesting, pleasurable and, while not as satisfying as sex with a man, better than just my vibrator.
while chatting one day, we had a chat room that was almost empty and a group of us began to have cyber sex. my imagination ran wild and one of my close female friend said "sammie, kiss my pussy". and then said "you know what i want, you know what will excite me, just enjoy it" my mind went wild, and my imagination of sharing such and intimate act with a female friend just both excited me and fulfilled a missing part of me. i don't know if i feel in love with her or in lust with her (and i never told her) but that sharing, that imagined intimacy with my friend made me question if i had denied myself a portion of love because i refused to let any of my female friends that close or that intimate to me. i slowly realized that if i were younger, my friendship with my female friends would have included at least the offer of that intimacy and hubby would have had to be willing to share me with them or her, because i don't think that i would have "slept around". now, at my age, i am not going to cheat on hubby behind his back with a woman nor am i going to tell him that i want to let my friendship grow to a sexual level with one of my friends. so, so to the world, i am going to remain the loving and attentive and loyal heterosexual wife but in my heart, i have a longing to enjoy that intimacy with a woman.
i envy those of you who were able to accept this longing as a young woman and not leave that hungary, that need, unfulfilled.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx and hugs to all. | 
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